lottery shmottery

As I came up in the office lift yesterday, I realised that I’d been dive-bombed by one of our feathered friends whilst walking through town. By the size of the mess, it could only have been a pigeon that splattered my jacket and bag strap and not one of the numerous seagulls that threaten from every rooftop. I stopped by a colleague’s room to say good morning and to ask if I’d been hit anywhere else too but she assured me ‘no’. She said it was supposed to be lucky to be dive-bombed and that maybe I should buy a lottery ticket. I’d heard this before, about the luck part I mean but wearing a jacket with bird crap stains down the front of it does not strike me as particularly lucky. Anyway, yesterday’s lottery was a big rollover so I bought a ticket. I’ve bought lottery tickets in the past. This is how it usually goes:

For some unknown reason I feel lucky so I log on to the lottery and select the Euro millions game. I pick the numbers at random and buy for that evening’s draw. If I later think about there being a winner’s email in my inbox the next day, I get a little frisson of excitement. What if I really have won? I’m not greedy. I don’t  need to have won all 58 million Euros or however much the jackpot was. I’d be happy with half or a quarter of it or just a million or two. A half million would be fine. A few thousands or hundreds even. Anything at all really! Just make it worth my while to have bought all those dud tickets in the past with a bit of interest thrown in for good measure, thank you. In the next breath I tell myself that people like me don’t win lotteries. Don’t ask me what ‘kind’ do. I’ve no idea but not my kind for sure. In my whole life I have won two raffle prizes and had one lottery win. Seriously! In my whole life that’s the extent of my prize winnings.

I never check the results and sometimes I don’t check my emails for days. This keeps my expectation of a win quite high. Well, there’s obviously an email waiting to say I’ve won but I won’t rush it. At the same time, as I never win anything, it’s unlikely to be there I tell myself, but then again why not? Someone has to win. Thinking like this can keep the excitement mounting. I try to imagine how I’ll react when I get the invitation to come and collect my winnings. Will I be able to walk into work next day without a smirk on my face? Will I even bother going to work next day? How will I share the winnings? What would be the first thing I would buy after the champagne and caviar?

Days after the draw I finally check the emails by which time I’ve almost forgotten about the lottery ticket. There is a lottery email! My heart skips a beat. My finger hovers over the mouse button. To open or not to open. No! No! Don’t delay it any longer! This is a life-changing email! I open it. Crap. It’s just about where they safely stored my ticket numbers. Only once have I received an ‘we have good news about your lottery ticket’ email. I won £2.50. Perhaps this week will be different. I bought the ticket on a Tuesday for the Tuesday draw instead of Friday. Might that have made me luckier? I want to check the emails now but at the same time I don’t want to because I’m bound to be disappointed again. I’ll be no poorer in spirit for not having won and if I won a substantial amount it might change me beyond all recognition but I’d quite like the opportunity to test the theory!

OK, I’ve convinced myself. No point in putting it off any longer. I’ll just publish this first and then check those emails… Back in a bit.

2 Responses to “lottery shmottery”

  1. Liz Says:

    well? don’t leave me in suspense!
    My trick is to leave the ticket on the fridge until it fades with age and curls a bit at the corners, as my belief is that an old ‘forgotten’ ticket just has to be the one that wins. The one that occasionally get press coverage….’Lottery winner remains elusive…’ I do worry though that there is a claim by date and it would my luck to have the winner but the ticket was TOO OLD!!
    Liz x
    PS a seagull depsosited the content of its bowels on my head/shoulder once and immediately I bought a ticket. I am still working for the NHS, so it wasn’t the lucky poo!

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