hunt the specs

I wear glasses for close work. I have five pairs of varying strength bought over many years and each pair is located in a different part of the house. One pair (the ones I wear most of the time now) is kept in the workroom . One pair is in the kitchen (so I can accurately see which finger I’ve sliced). One pair is kept at the side of the bed (for book at bedtime stuff). One pair is in my handbag (for reading labels in the supermarket and restaurant menus to JP who never brings his reading glasses when we’re out). The fifth pair, duplicates of the book at bedtimers, is also kept in the bedroom.

This morning I can’t find my workroom specs.  It is imperative that they be found for whilst I can wear the other older pairs without pain or eye strain, these particular spectacles are extremely comfortable to wear, do not slip off the end of my nose when I bend over and are immediately identifiable by their rimless lenses and blue legs.

I remember wearing them when preparing dinner yesterday and since I don’t need specs to watch television, I must have taken them off either before or not long after I sat down to watch the BBC news. Normally I would put them on the little table at the side of the settee but not last night. The shirt I was wearing is now in the wash basket which has been searched three four times but the specs are not there. JP tells me that his mother left her specs in the fridge once so obviously I have to check our fridge too but mine are not there.

Is it possible that I have thrown my specs out? Well, these days, anything is possible. I gave the bin a cursory search earlier but I’ve nothing to lose by looking again and lo and behold, there are my specs. Last night I must have pulled them from my shirt pocket along with a tissue that was destined for the bin. I won’t repeat what JP called me once I’d found them but it was less than complimentary. I am now considering a spectacle neck-chain purchase or an alarm of the sort you can buy to locate your car keys or maybe just supergluing them to my nose…

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